Through the Doorway

Elizabeth walks into her childhood home, it still smells like Mom's apple pie, even though it had been years since her mom had baked one. It’s almost like the smell had been baked into the wall. Here feels like home more than her studio apartment ever does. 

Her mom knew how to make a space feel like a home; though Elizabeth isn't sure anywhere will feel like home now that mom is gone. The house is technically hers now. Mom left it to her, it’s a big space just for her, and her mind was wheeling with options.

She had time to decide what to do with it, but she didn’t want to linger with her choice. Wandering through the familiar halls of her adolescence and childhood. 

Taking a deep breath she opens the door to her Mom's studio. She could still recall all the art that had been created in this room. 

"Oh my." Elizabeth gasps. Her mom still had the dress-up box in the corner of the room, she’d always assumed it got moved to the attic once she outgrew dress-up, "I wonder." 

She opens the old art supply closet, yep there it is, the "secret" door that leads to the backyard. Mom's studio really had been the back porch that her dad had converted into an art space for his wife. 

Growing up she used to believe that when she went through the "secret" door she ended up in a land of fairies and magic, her mom had even designed her a fairy costume to wear in her magical land. Opening the dress-up box, the dress is still neatly folded on top, she slowly lifts the dress out. Looking at it now makes her heart swell, when did she last wear the dress, there were so many little details she’d missed as a child. 

She stares back at the door, it’s most likely overgrown and wouldn't open but she steps towards it anyway, longing for something that feels familiar. As if something is calling out to her, she turns the knob and slowly pushes the door open. To her surprise, there's little resistance. And the door opens with ease.

The first thing she notices is that it’s raining. But it hadn’t been raining when she got here. There hadn’t even been rain in the forecast. Otherwise, she would have worn her rain boots. When she looks down, her feet are covered in rain shoes that look like they are made of leaves. As she stares at the space that is definitely not her mom’s backyard, she notices there is an umbrella by the door. It looks like it's made of twigs and leaves that are somehow held together by magic. 

Opening the umbrella she steps out into the magical land, as she takes more steps memories flow over her. A warmth fills her, and then she hears whispers, “She's back.” 

“Is that really her?”

“Someone get the grand fairy!”

The grand fairy – that feels familiar, she walks deeper into the forest that made her childhood. When suddenly fairies poke out from the trees and brush, using leaves as umbrellas. Near the end of the path, an old fairy appears. Elizabeth picks up her pace, her heart remembering the face of an old friend, she holds out her hand and the old fairy settles in her palm, “You came back.” The fairy’s voice is soft but worn. 

“I can't believe this is still here,” Elizabeth says in amazement. “I would have thought all the imagination had worn off.” 

“No, you held the imagination in your heart. You remembered us faintly, and so, we lived on. Your mother also painted us from memories of your stories.” The old fairy smiles and Elizabeth feels her composer slip. Her mom had given her a book of those paintings for the last birthday they celebrated together. 

Tears burn at Elizabeth’s eyes and she can’t stop them from rolling down her cheeks, hot stinging tears, the little fairy flies up and wipes the tears with a flower petal. “There, there. We were so sorry to hear of your mother's passing.” 

Elizabeth nods, “Thank you. It’s been so hard, and she left me the house and I don’t know what to do with it. It’s too much for just me, but how could I part with it?” Elizabeth falls to her knees losing the umbrella, and feeling the cold soak through her jeans, her hair quickly sticking to the sides of her face. 

However, the rain doesn’t pelt at her long before several fairies lift the umbrella over her. And the old fairy sits on her shoulder, “Hush now daughter of the forest, you don’t have to make any choices right now. There will be time for that later, now is the time for grief and loss. The house isn’t going anywhere. Surely the Mainland won’t rush you to choose.” 

“No, there is no real rush, I just… Mom would know what to do, she’d have wise words and I can’t even ask her what to do.” Elizabeth strikes her hands against her legs as more tears burst from her eyes. 

The old fairy flies down and gives a little pull on her hand, “Come walk with us.” Elizabeth nods, takes back the umbrella and numbly walks through the forest. As they walk she feels lighter, the pain is still there, but it’s not as sharp. 

“Will I ever feel like I can breathe again?” She whispers to the old fairy who still sits on her shoulder.

“You will, I promise. After rain, the sun always shines.” And as if right on cue they enter a little clearing and the sun shines, warming Elizabeth's cold body. 

“I wasn’t ready to do this without her.” She lowers the umbrella and lets the sun smile on her face. 

 “No one ever is, daughter of the forest. But you will find her lessons and love everywhere you look.” The old fairy pats her cheek. 

“If I were to stay here, or rather at the house, would you still be here? You know if I wanted to come back and visit?” She can’t help but feel a bit silly asking such a question. 

“When you need us we will be here. After all, this is your magical land.” The old fairy flies in front of her. 

Elizabeth smiles a little before bidding them farewell and going back through the “secret” door. A few weeks later after sorting through her Mom’s stuff, she moves in. 

Sitting down at her mom's old desk, she pulls out the book of paintings and starts writing The Adventures of the Girl and the Fairy Door.